Not too long ago I ran a 15-mile training run, and all conditions made for a perfect day to go put in some good miles. The day was gorgeous, cool temps, sunshine, low winds, autumn was in full swing and the trees were ablaze in color. I should have really enjoyed this run, but instead just felt completely burnt out.
Lately I’ve been feeling that way, and it’s been in more ways than just my nonstop marathon training. I have barely posted a blog entry, I hardly log in my Daily Mile numbers (or pass on encouragement to others on DM, which is a big part of the community), I’m terrible at responding to email, and Twitter is becoming less and less a part of my daily routine. I can’t say why for certain, but I know I spend ALL DAY in front of a computer during the week, and the last thing I feel like doing is going home and going right back ON the computer. These things used to take priority, and lately I am finding it to be much more of a chore. I don’t enjoy it these days; if I don’t enjoy it, I think it just means I need to set it aside until I feel that need to dive back into it with more enthusiasm.
To be frank, I’m a Generation X girl. I lived in a time where there was no such thing as social media. My first cell phone was an analog with a pull-out antenna in the late ‘90’s, internet was exciting and new, I was still making mix tapes on cassette, and my husband and I used to actually handwrite letters on one another when we were apart. And honestly, I liked it and I really miss those days. I liked spending my free time doing things that DIDN’T involve the internet. I like spending time with my spouse, being with friends and family (and keeping the iPhone well out of range), catching up on reading (I only have maybe 1000+ books to catch up on), video games (that didn’t involve being online), art projects, photo projects, and just doing more than logging online and letting time pass me by, whiling my life away online reading my Twitter feed, thinking of things to blog about, trying to keep up with the bare minimum of social media and failing miserably at it. I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m just not good at this kind of multi-tasking.
I don’t want to give up and just unplug permanently, but I may just need to hibernate and go into Sleep Mode for a while with the little social media I have committed to. There’s just dozens of things I want to do with my life that don’t involve these things, and I mean absolutely no offense or disrespect to those who can keep up with it…all I can say is kudos to you for being able to juggle it all and have a smile on your face at the end of the day. I’m just not that strong enough.
I haven’t lost my passion, I still want to do what I am doing, but certain things in my life take precedence, and I want to make sure I can fulfill those priorities first. If you see less of me, I promise I haven’t disappeared. I would hope, and think, any one of you has gone through this kind of burnout and needed to sort of scale things down a notch in order to feel well-rested with a clear head and eventually reignite that passion for the things that you felt bogged you down.
I’ll still be running. I’ll still be taking care of myself and my family. I’ll still be loving life and perhaps going back to enjoying some old pastimes, and I will come back when I feel ready. That’s a heartfelt promise. And in the meantime, I thank you wholeheartedly for all of your love, support and encouragement.